Firefighter $313

I love sitting around a fire in the living room.

Or rather, I used to love it before I had a mobile child.

Now it makes me really, really nervous!

I spent tonight standing with my back to the fire at my mom's house watching Bellerina try to finagle her way closer and closer.

This child is not getting a smore any time soon because judging by her mesmerized stare she would literally walk straight in.

Secret Service $480

Today I was thrown my first ever, totally awesome, surprise birthday party!

My mother's house was filled with people I love, and it was fantastic!

Bellerina was the only person in the house more overwhelmed than me.

She didn't want to sit with me, because there were so many other people in the house who she loves to play with.

But every 20 minutes she had to walk around and find me, stare me in the eyes and silently say to me "Good, you're still here, got my back, I'm safe", then she would wander off to find Mema or Daddy.

She wanted me to be there, in the distance, so she knew where I was if she needed me, but I didn't interrupt her photo opportunities.

Bomb Squad $250

Let's just start off with one side note: These guys do not get paid enough.

Nothing says "wow we just had a great party" like waking up to a total explosion in your house.
The bomb did not spare a single sector, the living room was caught up in its wake, along with the kitchen (obviously), the dining room, and a dessert table disaster (which I promptly grabbed a piece of chocolate from...just doing my part cleaning up).

Bomb squad clean up was already in full force when I woke up since my husbando can't sleep when he knows that there is a mess to clean! So I just rolled up my sleeves and joined in, with my eyes half open, praying that a cup of coffee would magically descend from the heavens and insert itself directly in to my blood stream.

Ah, the holiday morning after. Nothing quite like it.

Restaurant Manager $196

Did I stuff the turkey?
No. (Thank goodness!)
Did I make the award winning out of control good lobster bisque?
No. (But I did eat plenty of it)
Did I coordinate the timing of everything, and the serving order, and the seating arrangement, and the dinner time, and make the majority of the sides?
Yes, yes I did.
And for that I consider myself the manager of Thanksgiving.
I never could have successfully had 15 people at the table without all the help from my family and friends!

Interior Designer $360

The day before Thankgiving...equal parts exciting and totally out of control!
This year I'm very lucky that my in laws were already up, so they were on Bellerina-duty while I spent the afternoon rearranging the house, and coming up with a design plan for my table.
The bar was rearranged, the entire layout of the dining room was totally disrupted, and each plate on the table was carefully placed to provide the right amount of "mix and match" (thank you Amanda), because honestly, who has 15 of the same plate??
All in all I think it was a successful final product, well balanced, with a touch of whimsy.

Peter Pan Driver $96

Fare from Kingston, RI to Brockton, MA?

$25 normally.

But we give a $25 discount if you are a college student who will tell us good stories and help the driver to relive her favorite Thursday nights.

Ah, the talk of frat houses and the solemn vow to avoid jungle juice at all costs made me nostalgic.

No, I didn't pick up a hitchhiker.

My cousin was making the traditional trek home from the holidays and I took her on one leg of her journey...and don't worry Di... she's being safe!

Personal Shopper $106

Ok, so technically Gap Kids doesn't offer a personal shopper service, but Macy's does, so I will count this job.

The Nana and I got away for a lovely day of browsing stores and have a leisurely lunch.

So of course we found ourselves either talking about or shopping for Bellerina 85% of the time.

We were an absolutely dynamite personal shopping team in Gap Kids.

Coat, dress, tights, matching hat, she's ready to go for Christmas Eve.

That's right, a very effective, AND very well prepared shopping team!

Truancy Officer $144

I took Bellerina to the swings today with her cousin, it should have been a nice, pleasant, unseasonably warm afternoon of swinging, sliding, see-sawing, and general fun-ing.

It was very close to ruined by a group of 12 year olds.

Clearly kids, this playground is not for you.

I kind of thought they might migrate away after actual children got there to use the park for its intended purpose, but they just gave us surly looks and continued to drop the F-bomb like they were alone.

So I found myself thinking "Shouldn't you be in school?" and I thought about turning them in.

Til I realized it was 3:30. So technically no.

Note to self: Go to the park before noon.

Little punks.

Artist $164

I mastered the most difficult art medium in the world today.

The toddler sized big crayon.

Probably for the first time since I started coloring with Bellerina I managed to stay totally in the lines with those bad boys.

It's like driving an 18 wheeler through The North End, those huge points just don't work with the pictures you're supposed to color.

I think that they do it on purpose so when kids start using smaller, regular sized crayons parents can rejoice and say "Wow, my daughter must be a genius, she's learned to color in the lines!"

No, you just stopped giving her crayons with points 5 times too large for the paper.

My Snoopy picture today was a masterpiece. For 5 minutes. Then it was fully covered in green.

Physicist $244

To be more specific, today I was a Physicist specializing in Electromagnetism.

My hypothesis is thus:

(17 months X child) + Mom + Thansgiving[T-7 days] = Clinging

The more that I have to do, the more that Bellerina would like to attach herself physically to me at all times. She knows that we're having 15 people over for Thanksgiving, that my inlaws are arriving next Tuesday, and that I'm desperately trying to get stuff done so that I'm not rushing around last minute like a full on lunatic.

She can sense it.

And that harried madness is like an electric charge, she must be near it, must attach herself to my leg and remind me that she's there all day with "Mama...mama...up...mama...up".

Good thing she's so dang cute.

Splash Mountain Custodian $80

I always wondered who had to clean up all the water around Splash Mountain when the day was done.

I actually used to think it might be a pretty cool job, sloshing through water and shlepping it back in to the pool. Like basically getting paid to play in a puddle.

That is until Bellerina decided to turn the bath in Nana's sink in to her own personal Splash Mountain.

She was a complete wild woman tonight!

Water up the walls, all over the windows, half way down the kitchen floor, and of course, Nana got the brunt of it.

So well my mom was getting her in her cozy PJs I was shlepping paper towels over the floor...not as fun as I had imagined.

Jordan's furniture marketing department $176

I am selling basically everyone I know on Jordan's Furniture's Enchanted Village.

Why?

Because I'm built for selling and it's just what I do, totally unintentionally and subconsciously.

But also because it is freaking free, and that is just flat out awesome.

Did you know that it costs about $25 to have your child's picture taken with Santa at a mall?

That is 2 cases of diapers (which as you know, once your a parent is how you judge all purchases).

At Jordans, it's free. Free I tell you. Just bring your own camera and snap a photo! Isn't that what everyone wants anyways? A digital image to forward to family and friends?

PLUS it comes with a walk through the sweet and charming Enchanted Village.

Oh, and they have blueberry muffins at the end. What do blueberry muffins have to do with Christmas? Well, if you have to ask then you're just not a Bostonian.

Rachael Ray recipe developer $431

If I were a recipe developer for Rachael Ray's show, or magazine, or line of hair care products, I would totally have a winner today!

I present to you meatball wontons with spicy tomato dipping sauce:

The stuffing is a turkey meatball, with onions, and fresh parsley, and the sauce is a mix of tomato sauce, balsamic vinegar and red pepper flakes. The best part about this meal? It basically is a fun way to eat spaghetti and meatballs with like 1/4 the calories since 8 wontons are only 160 calories.

PS I wanted to actually be Rachael Ray today but the husbando said that would be cheating on my annual salary because she makes a measly $16 million a year.

And while we're on the subject I would like it noted I can't believe she makes that much! If someone wants to pay me like $160,000 to do this stuff, I'd be a freaking bargain.

La Leche League outreach $144

I had the delightful pleasure of getting to go out to dinner tonight with a good friend from college who I haven't seen in WAY too long, her roomie and Bellerina.

Somehow the conversation turned to breast feeding, as I truly never realized was possible before Bellerina, but it turns out, all roads lead to boobs.

Of course I boiled the reasons to breastfeed down to my two big ones:

1. It's super convenient at 2am when you don't have to make a bottle

2. It burns 500 calories a day. 500!!

Just in case you're keeping track that means that you could drink like a whole carton of egg nog. Not that anyone would want to do that (except me perhaps) but I'm just saying you COULD.

Poet $86

I thought I was going to have to resort to rhyming to get Bellerina to eat tonight so I composed a little ditty:

Mozzarella Portobellah

and Teeny-Weenie Tortellini

Repeat and repeat

Until you EAT!

But it turns out that the poem was only needed for the tortellini because she went bananas over the mushrooms. Go figure!

And yes, I know that it's portobello...but that's just not how we say it in Boston.

Twilight Zone Writer $365

If I were a Twilight Zone writer, my episode would start something like this:

It was a bleak, rainy night, dark as obsidian and bone chillingly cold, when through the window of a small house we see an impossible sight.

There is a baby in highchair, she is voluntarily eating and asking for fish!

Fish I say!

Run away, RUN AWAY!

(Ok, so it kind of turned in to Monty Python at the end but you get the picture!)

Contestant on Top Chef $150

While spending the weekend in Jersey, I had to endure a very intense interview.

My father in law asked me to make the risotto for dinner.

Sort of!

First I had to give a play by play of how I make risotto, and then I was told "No garlic or wine, add butter, and you have to use at least two boxes of stock".

He did his best to not watch over my shoulder.

But I was still totally nervous.

I'll take the grueling interview, it meant that I got out of sleep duty! It's the worst trying to get Bellerina to go to sleep when she's not at home!

Bakery Owner $161

Today I was a baking machine.

Well...for me...since I don't bake.

I made coffee cake and granola.

The reason that I'm considering myself a bakery owner today is because miraculously I didn't eat either one! I packaged them right up to make the drive to NJ with us tonight.

Though honestly, the only reason I didn't eat them is because we don't have any yogurt in the house and I hate dry granola, AND I couldn't figure out how to cut out a piece of coffee cake and mash it back together to look "whole".

Bellerina "helped" me bake by sitting there and stirring the corks I put in a pot for her.

Yes corks. Like wine corks.

I realize it's probably not the best play food item, but hey, they were available!

Pictures to come tomorrow when I unwrap these goodies!

Disney World Employee $96

Ok, so technically Disney World would never hire me for Cinderella, apparently there are clauses about being blond, blue eyed, perky, and able to withstand 1,000 children you don't know wiping their noses on your dress and give you disgusting kisses.

But today I fully embodied Cinderella for Bellerina.

We went through everything that "Cinderella Mama" does, including finding a fairy Godmother for me (a very large stuffed hippo), a wand (paper towel roll) and Bellerina had a pair of glass slippers that were just a tad too small for me but it was pretend after all.

Someone please tell me that the princess obsession goes away!

I fear that next Halloween I will have to dress up as Malificent, which honestly, I'm better suited for physically and personality-wise.

REI Employee $84

I wasn't teaching Bellerina about climbing....Yet.

This morning however we did get to have a good discussion about winter preparedness and what it means to walk out the front door when it is below 30 degrees out.

She was on paraphernalia overload for a little why.

Wait...I have to wear a long sleeve, a fleece jacket, fleece pants, socks, super fluffy slippers, and a hat just to drive Dad to work?

I tried to explain that it would get worse when it felt like we were living at the top of Mount Washington, circa February 10th next year. Then she will be fully outfitted in a snow suit designed to withstand sub zero temperatures, icicles of death, and of course the vicious snow angel.

Rock the Vote volunteer $0

Today we taught Bellerina an important lesson.

You must vote!

In fact, while we waited in line to sign in, she kept yelling "I want vote!".

I believe that the woman behind us tried to inform her that she would have to wait a few years but she was having none of that and yelled back at her, "VOTE!".

Even if I get an Alex P. Keaton, I will still be proud that I taught her to vote.

Disappointed.

But proud.